DON'T YOU DARE COME TO THE EASTERN ECONOMIC FORUM WITHOUT A PCR TEST!
Doing so would endanger Sustainable Development
You gladly paid the $8,000 entrance fee to attend the 2023 Eastern Economic Forum, and now you’re ready to mingle with dozens of other sweaty businesspersons who will soon be congregating in Vladivostok to talk about developing things in a sustainable way.
But where is your PCR test? You think you can walk around all willy-nilly at this forum without a not-fit-for-purpose swab-up-your-nose-or-sometimes-in-your-mouth? You thought wrong, mister.
Don’t you know that Russia’s Eastern Economic Forum—which is a very important forum for developing Public-Private Sberbank Partnerships in the East—follows guidelines dictated by the World Health Organization, which is a very important organization that works tirelessly to safeguard worldwide health?
Seriously: Did you even bother reading the Eastern Economic Forum’s website before arriving in Vladivostok to network with Sberbank?
(Maybe you follow Aussie Cossack on Telegram, and he told you that Moscow was minutes away from withdrawing from the WHO, and now you are confused? I am really very sorry about that.)
But there’s a path to redemption for the Untested: The conference will feature several swabbing stations, which will “work from early morning until late at night,” Primorsky Krai governor Oleg Kozhemyako told TASS.
The state media outlet explained:
Without a negative PCR test result from a laboratory accredited by Rospotrebnadzor, name badges will not be activated. Participants of the plenary session will submit additional tests.
Here are just a few of the many interesting topics that you can learn about at this forum (but only if you have an Activated badge):
Climate-related Business Objectives: The Limits of Possibilities
[…] In today’s conditions, it is far more difficult to maintain the steps and efforts required to advance the climate agenda in Russia. Decarbonization can be continued together with new partners and with the help of new projects in the East and in the Asia–Pacific countries. Cooperation with China is becoming very promising. What challenges and opportunities from the point of view of carbon regulation does the turn to the East bring for companies?
Moderator:
Andrey Sharonov — Chief Executive Officer, National ESG-Alliance
Panellists:
Irina Bakhtina — Sustainable Development Director, RUSAL
Tatiana Zavyalova — Senior Vice President for ESG, Sberbank (online)[…]
That’s a lot of climate agenda, sustainability, and ESG. (The National ESG-Alliance was created by Russia’s friendliest banker, Herman Gref.)
Yes, Russia is part of the "sustainable development" revolution
The St. Petersburg International Economic Forum is underway and judging from photographs posted on Telegram, dozens of rich people are already networking with alcohol on rooftop terraces. (Hopefully they are all Virus-negative and have no signs of mild illness, o…
If you have an Activated badge you are also invited to attend a roundtable discussion about creating “social ratings” for Russian companies:
Sustainable Development of the State and Business: On Those who Look to the Future
In Russia, several companies are already showing their responsibility for the future of the country, region, and city in which they work, as well as their workforce. The government is ready to support responsible business. To this end, a project is being implemented to introduce a social rating of companies (EPS rating).
The rating provides a universal assessment that aims to develop a business’s level of reliability, as well as social and environmental responsibility. In addition, Russia is currently developing a standard for the social capital of businesses based on the principles of responsible business.
Do other countries have a social rating of companies and a standard for the social capital of businesses? What support measures could encourage businesses to invest in achieving Russia’s national development goals? How should the experience gained by business associations and leading companies as part of the ESG agenda be taken into account when implementing new initiatives?
But if Very Serious People pontificating about the ESG agenda isn’t your cup of tea, there’s also a seminar on how to make BRICS more Green and Sustainable. It’s moderated by some guy from Sberbank, obviously:
Global Challenges of Green Agenda: Test of Resilience and a Catalyst for Cooperation between BRICS Countries
The motto of the 15th BRICS Summit held in Johannesburg on August 22-24 2023, “BRICS and Africa: partnership for mutually accelerated growth, sustainable development and inclusive multilateralism” sets a new vector of movement towards sustainable development of the member countries of BRICS which have huge resources and potential for exponential growth, but are facing global challenges such as various climate and social risks.
Despite the fact that the transition to a more sustainable development model in the BRICS countries is a multidimensional task, there is already a tendency to accelerate this movement, both at the international and regional levels. What are the new climate challenges the BRICS countries will have to deal with? What steps are the BRICS countries taking to implement the energy transition and ensure economic sustainability? What can we learn from each other? How can the BRICS countries use new opportunities for cooperation in the field of green innovation and low-carbon development? […]
Moderator:
Alexander Vedyakhin — First Deputy Chairman of the Executive Board, Sberbank[…]
And if you are craving even more Sber, the executive director of Sberbank’s Health Industry Center, Victor Ushakov, will be chatting about what kind of data needs to be collected to protect public health:
Territorial Planning in the Health Care System
[…] How can we properly manage resources and correctly plan the location of medical infrastructure facilities? What data is needed and which government bodies need to participate in creating an optimal system to provide medical care to the population?
Why does Russia’s friendliest bank have a Health Industry Center? Oh, I think we all know why.
The green checkmark that cares for all Russians
It’s a proven fact that economic conferences are massive snooze-fests where nothing of consequence is said or done; the “real talk” occurs in dimly lit rooms where central bankers and corporate monopolists smoke their sour apple vapes as they plot the global enslavement of every living creature and grain of sand. Tha…
Panel discussions will also explore how Mussolini—sorry, public-private partnerships—can help develop Russia’s Far Eastern Federal District:
[T]he new conditions of economic development require the consolidation of efforts by all stakeholders to formulate an optimal approach and foster interaction to address the strategic objectives of economic development, the financial market, and infrastructure renewal. This includes taking into account the opportunities and limitations of PPPs.
Participants will include Anna Baginskaya, the Managing Director of Sberbank’s PPP Center. Sberbank sure does have a lot of Centers.
See you in Vladivostok!
1. 8k entry fee
2. Snooze fest
3. PCR test not looking for a virus
Pick your best reason for staying at home and scratching your arse instead.
Yep, showing up without a test would be nothing short of terrorism. :-) Never mind that the PCR test was never primed with an actual isolated purified virus, because no one has actually isolated and purified SARS-CoV-2. Or at least no one admits to it, per the 217 responses so far (the number keeps growing) to FOI requests for knowledge of proof that such isolation and purification has ever been done. Thanks, Riley!