PCR tests, gene therapy & juicy climate gossip: Russia's Davos kicks off in St. Petersburg!
Cheburashka will moderate a panel of Sber specialists, because sure why not?
It’s mid-June—you know what that means. Yes, it means you have somehow survived the first half of 2023, which is no small achievement.
But it also foretells the start of the St. Petersburg International Economic Forum, the annual gathering of Russia’s best and brightest (and representatives from various space lizard projects, Big Pharma executives, and other respected members of the global community).
Well, as Jaroslav Hašek once observed, “it takes all kinds to make a world.” He was referring to a prostitute who was cavorting with members of the Austro-Hungarian Armed Forces, if I remember correctly.
Last year’s SPIEF was an absolute banger. There was a lot of pearl-clutching and anxiety about the Not-War preventing top talent from attending SPIEF 2022, but those fears turned out to be misplaced.
Even Dr. Tedros joined the festivities, via Zoom, to discuss deep questions, such as “how soon will the global population be vaccinated, and what international cooperation solutions can be used to accelerate this process?”, and how can the global community “increase Russian public trust in and awareness of the positive effects of vaccination?”
I’m not being facetious, those are verbatim discussion topics from one of last year’s thought-provoking panels.
SPIEF 2023 promises to be equally edifying.
Here’s a sampling of this year’s “business program”:
PRESENTING THE RESULTS OF THE RUSSIAN REGIONAL INVESTMENT CLIMATE INDEX
SUSTAINABLE DIGITAL DIALOGUE AS A DRIVER FOR A MULTIPOLAR WORLD
THE CLIMATE AGENDA VS TECHNOLOGICAL SOVEREIGNTY: HOW TO TURN CHALLENGES INTO OPPORTUNITIES?
DIGITAL DICTATORSHIP VS DIGITAL SOVEREIGNTY: PROBLEMS, RISKS, OPPORTUNITIES
You get the idea.
Of course, there will also be panel discussions about de-dollarization and the ascendancy of BRICS.
At the end of the four-day event (which started today), conference-goers will have the “opportunity to undergo speed-dating with mentors”—which sounds like a dangerously sexual euphemism for “networking”.
Obviously—this goes without saying—all SPIEF participants must take a PCR test before they are allowed on the premises. Masks will not be mandatory.
As per tradition, Herman Gref’s Sber will dazzle this gaggle of weirdos with all sorts of stupid gimmicks, like a robot that can doodle.
But the main attraction will be a deepfake hologram of famous Soviet cartoon-beast Cheburashka, who is slated to “moderate” Sber’s panel discussion about … I don’t even know:
Sber will make Cheburashka the moderator of its own panel session as part of its participation in the St. Petersburg International Economic Forum 2023. The character loved by millions of moviegoers will be recreated using 3D animation and Sber’s own deepfake technology.
“Our choice of Cheburashka as the moderator of the Sber session is not accidental: given the information volatility in the celebrity and opinion leaders market, this character will not create reputational risks in the future,” Sber’s press service explained.
Okay.
To summarize: SPIEF 2023 will be four days of highly sustainable, digital, carbon-conscious, multipolar, de-dollarized, BRICS-led, PCR-tested, 3D-furry gene therapy. A few lucky attendees might even get to play tonsil hockey with balding, dumpling-shaped businessmen.
Enjoy the rest of 2023.
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I was intrigued by the piece on Cheburashka. Back in my Hollywood days I was involved as the music composer for a joint Soviet/American animation production between Mosfilm Animation and Film Roman (producers of the popular "Heathcliff" animated cat). The project was titled "Lucky Start" and it was about a dolphin and his friends. I remember practically nothing about the story of the film, but remember quite a bit about the experience.
One assignment I had was to become very familiar with Russian (Soviet) animation, and was told to watch countless hours of past and present animation and stop-motion product produced by Mosfilm. Of course Cheburashka came up several times...The work I watched was pretty impressive.
Of course my comment here means nothing at all to your readers...but thought I would throw that story of my past in there as a reminisce of times when we actually did and thought about things other than this insane crap going on now...
I couldn't believe that they're still wearing those useless masks, as if they still wanted to make everyone aware that they're officially part of the New Normal - and they didn't get the memo that the New Normals have terminated that game long ago.
So I went to the site and accidentally misread:
> All Forum participants and media representatives who will be present at events must fake a PCR test for COVID-19.
Then again, assuming those who're involved with those events do not read what investigative journalists write (or anyone who has noticed that the numbers didn't match the narrative)... If they just muzzle up whenever they're told to, maybe thinking "I don't like this" but not reaching the point of asking "why, why not those who talk, why not before 2020", then I guess I understand how they would keep wearing their symbol of obedience forever, probably until their boss saw his idol from the Golden West who's not wearing this symbol anymore at which point they'd also stop doing that in Russia...? But are they really all just blindly copying this ridiculous rule? I don't see anyone who seems to be genuinely afraid of getting sick because SOMEONE ELSE is openly breathing air.
One nuance appears to be that in the West, it's usually the boss, manager and whoever else has something to say over others who would be very strict about the most ridiculous rule, to the point of double-masking. I'm not sure but I haven't seen any Mr. Gref or similar muzzled up? Then again, Doctor Gates never had to muzzle up, not even before he jokingly told everyone that all those funny experimental vaccines don't really work. I wish we had a competent virologist who could explain that phenomenon, lol.