The ruble is getting wrecked. WAR?

The ruble's down. Something's up? Maybe.

A ruble monster handing out military draft cards to unsuspecting Russians

Disclaimer: just like everyone else who is semi-honest, we want to make it perfectly clear that we have absolutely no idea what is going on.

Hello friends.

War! W-A-R. This is the name of the new COVID mutation pulsating across the planet. Everyone is bracing for WAR. Are there enough ventilators? There are never enough ventilators. We need a WAR lockdown to protect the ventilators.

Anyway. The ruble is getting a bit angsty. Because of WAR? Maybe.

What does this mean? Possibly nothing.

This is not unprecedented, actually. The ruble was hovering around this exact spot back in April 2021. But… there is a but.

Intel from an Edward Slavsquat counter-gang psy op operative

Your humble Moscow correspondent is not an economist or a foreign policy analyst. But—we do feel obligated to inform our readers that JP Morgan dumped its rubles… at a loss? Apparently yes:

Amid increasing geopolitical tension [over Ukraine], the American bank JP Morgan, the largest in the country in terms of assets, completely left the ruble, Reuters reported.

The bank, which manages assets of 2.6 trillion dollars, put an end to its holdings in the Russian currency due to unpredictable risks surrounding the situation in Ukraine. At the same time, the bank admitted that it had previously underestimated the danger and, as a result, suffered losses on such investments.

At the same time, Russia’s Central Bank has stopped buying foreign currency—maybe because the Venezuelan bolívar is way too expensive now? Maybe.

What does it mean?

Also at the same time, Mikhail Delyagin, Deputy Chairman of the State Duma Committee on Economic Policy, predicted things will probably settle down, without a WAR; the ruble will implode later—maybe in spring or something. Thanks, Delyagin!

How did JP Morgan mess this one up? They had the inside scoop.

Whatever happens, probably anyone holding rubles is going to be super poor soon.

It is what it is.