Over the past several weeks, many friends and total strangers have emailed us to express concern that our internet scribblings could land us in hot water with the Russian authorities. Why? Just for telling the truth?
We foolheartedly dismissed these warnings as hokey pearl-clutching. But just now we received a ping, and after clicking over to our email client we began to sweat profusely (we have big pores, too)….
Well friends, it’s time to pack it up. We fought valiantly but we cannot possibly continue to blog, now that the Moscow authorities are asking us to… tell you about more vigilant mask enforcement in the metro?
To be fair to the Moscow’s State Public Institution Transportation Organizer, the email was actually sent to Anti-Empire.com. Over the past eighteen months we’ve written various articles for Anti-Empire detailing the COVID freak show in Russia, including a deep-dive into Moscow’s compulsory vaccination policy—which pointed out that city authorities were lying about many things, including PPE usage in the metro.
We’ve worked in media for a long time and know a bit about how these types of emails are spawned. Probably a Moscow Transport intern did a sophisticated Google search for English language websites mentioning masks + the Russian capital’s public transportation system, and just assumed all these websites were operated by knuckle-dragging Neanderthals who advocate for triple-masking.
Anyway, here’s the “event” (???) that the Russian government wants you to know about (verbatim, from the Word document they sent us):
Moscow tightens control on mask-wearing in transport over Omicron concerns
Vladislav Sultanov, head of the State Institution "Transportation organizer", said that Moscow transport tightens control on mask-wearing over Omicron spread.
Inspectors of the "Transportation organizer" have revealed more than 700,000 violations of the mask mandate in public transport since the beginning of pandemic. Nearly 500 inspectors monitor the compliance with the mask regime in public transport. Almost 50,000 people violated the face-covering rules in November.
“We decided to tighten control on mask-wearing in transport to curb the spread of coronavirus. Our inspectors have revealed more than 700,000 violations of mask-wearing rules since the beginning of pandemic. Omicron is potentially more contagious than previous variants, although experts do not know yet if it will cause more severe illness. It is essential now to wear masks if cases are rising and there is a new variant. They protect the spread of the virus so they should be worn“, - Sultanov said.
He noted that it is important for passengers to keep masks from slipping down off of their noses. According to him, scarfs, bandanas or napkins cannot be used as masks.
And the photos that they attached in the email:
So far, a grand total of sixteen Russians have tested positive for The Omicron. And a lot of them were vaccinated, according to Sputnik V murderer Alexander Gintsburg.
There’s so much doom and gloom on the internet—but why? We’re witnessing historic levels of incompetence.
All of this non-stop failure makes us want to break out into dance.
Hang in there man! Will send in my 'hood thugs if they keep tryin' to talk reckless to you via these emails!
By the way, 700 thousand mask violations since the start of the pandemic? More than half of the entire Moscow metro is not wearing masks or has them "slipped down on the chin" at all times, and that's just what I saw when going there maybe ten times over the past year! Probably more like 700 million violations weekly.
Not going to lie, you actually had me worried for a moment there. I suspect the main reason you haven't been black-bagged yet is due to your irascible sense of humor. Laughter in the face of death is appreciated by even the most dour of Slavic hearts.