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Russia's Fauci receives giant bag of delicious rubles

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Russia's Fauci receives giant bag of delicious rubles

We respect the hustle!

Edward Slavsquat
Oct 27, 2021
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Russia's Fauci receives giant bag of delicious rubles

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Don’t hate the player, hate the game!

Alexander Gintsburg is the Crown Jewel of Russia. Since taking the reins at the prestigious and very fancy Gamaleya Center in 1997, Gintsburg and his team of world-class scientists have created an awe-inspiring zero vaccines approved for non-emergency use outside of Russia.

Before he invented Sputnik V, his greatest accomplishment was injecting 2,000 Africans with anti-Ebola juice as part of a Phase 3 trial.

For his intense brain-labor, in 2019 Gintsburg was compensated around 7.7 million rubles ($110,000). This is very respectable money in Russia—especially for someone who produces nothing that is actually marketable. (The average monthly salary in Moscow is around 100k rubles, which translates to roughly $17,000/year. But this number is skewed by caviar-guzzling oligarchs who infest the city. In truth, many Muscovites live on $10,000/year or less.)

Hard-earned rubles. Those Africans won’t inject themselves!

But then Gamaleya’s director struck gold.

In 2020—the year when the COVID muse inspired him to create the safest, most effective vaccine on earth in record-shattering time—Gintsburg raked in more 18.3 million delicious rubles ($264,000).

Nice.

Yes, we understand that $264,000 is probably what a mid-level Pfizer intern receives each year for sharpening pencils. But this is Russia. And this is the Gamaleya Center:

Gamaleya Center’s vector-based roof tree

Look, Gintsburg deserves every kopek—and not just because he supervised the creation of The World’s First Registered (in Russia) COVID Vaccine (which is a very sketchy vaccine, by the way).

Gintsburg is more than just the Godfather of Sputnik V. He also makes up random bullshit about COVID and his amazing vaccine, which is a full-time job. He’s a professional guano faucet—Russia’s Anthony Fauci, in other words.

We are currently working on a 10-volume anthology of Gintsburg’s non-stop lying, but here’s a little taste:

Sputnik V provides robust, years-long immunity!

April 2021: Gintsburg says he thinks Sputnik V will provide full protection against COVID for 5, maybe 10 years—maybe even longer.

May 2021: Gintsburg says Sputnik V remains effective for two years.

June 2021: Gintsburg says you’re going to need a booster shot in six months.

Strong Fauci vibes

Gintsburg’s deadly “Moscow strain” mutates into a “hypothetical phenomenon”

On June 15—the same day that Moscow’s chief sanitary doctor signed a decree ordering businesses in various sectors to vaccinate 60% of their employees—Gintsburg warned that Russia’s capital might be under attack from a dangerous new variant… the dreaded Moscow Strain.

“At present, a study of the Moscow strain and the effectiveness of Sputnik V against it is underway, we think that the vaccine will be effective, but we must wait for the results of the study,” Gintsburg told RIA Novosti.

The “Moscow strain” magically evaporated a week later—while compulsory vaccination remained (and now covers the entire country).

“At present, it is difficult to judge the emergence of a clearly differentiated Moscow variety of the new coronavirus,” the government-run Vector Institute said in a statement on June 23. Despite Gintsburg’s claims, the Moscow strain was “for the most part a conditional and hypothetical phenomenon.” 

It’s a very juicy story, this Moscow strain business—and what came after is also very interesting. We wrote about it.

Gintsburg: “I injected my teen granddaughter”; Also Gintsburg: “It’s not safe to give kids Sputnik V without proper clinical trials”

In a December 2020 interview, Gintsburg claimed that he injected his 14-year-old granddaughter with Sputnik V. Watch him look away from the camera in shame as he makes this hilarious claim (starts at the 2:00 mark, English translation):

Sputnik V hadn’t yet been tested on minors. How did he know what dosage to use? He injected his own granddaughter, while simultaneously insisting that it’s not yet safe to give children the drug? Really?

Safe enough for Gintsburg’s teen granddaughter, though?

We could keep going but we’ll stop here.

Enjoy your rubles, Gintsburg. You really, truly earned them. Each and every one of them.

This guy is even more Fauci than Fauci.

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