I'm digging a top secret village tunnel
Exciting updates from Novgorod's best unaccredited village research institute
Hi there.
It’s been a few days. I’ve been neglecting my blog duties. Again. Sorry about that.
But the good news is that the Edward Institute for Village Studies (EIVS), which is widely considered the most prestigious village institute in all of Novgorod Oblast, now has its own tunnel.
And that’s just one of several impressive academic breakthroughs that have occurred in just the past two weeks.
EIVS begins construction on village tunnel network
There comes a time in every man’s life when he has to choose between being haunted by painful what-ifs, or digging a tunnel underneath Ekaterina’s garden without asking her first if it would be okay to do that.
And so, approximately 10 days ago, we began work on one of EIVS’ most ambitious projects to date:
What you are looking at is the beginning of what will eventually be a secret village tunnel network. The logs were salvaged from a nearby ruin and will serve as the shell of a benign-looking structure that will actually be the entrance to a top secret tunnel system that will allow me to sneak around the village undetected.
Stay tuned for the virtual tour. Maybe sometime in mid-August … 2025? Tunneling is tough.
EIVS hosts Russian folk concert; delighted villagers dance
The Institute was visited by two gifted musicians from St. Petersburg, Svetlana and Irina, who delighted the village with folk tunes during an outdoor concert on our front porch on Wednesday evening:
About 1/3 of the village showed up and danced and clapped. Everyone had a grand time.
After the concert the Edward Institute held a banquet (appetizers and booze) in honor of our extremely talented guests.
The duo will be performing again tomorrow at the village’s social club; there are even rumors that your correspondent might make a cameo appearance during the show. If these rumors turn out to be true, footage will be PAYWALLED for national security reasons.
Thank you again to Svetlana and Irina for agreeing to spend a few days with us in the village even though we don’t have plumbing.
Their music is wonderful life-affirming magic. We are very honored to have these two incredible artists in our presence!
As predicted, the puppies escaped from Puppy Supermax
In May your correspondent built an indestructible puppy pen using a broken refrigerator and roofing slate. It was solid; it was escape-proof.
Days passed, and the puppies became larger and more versatile, and soon enough they were able to effortlessly traverse the removable barrier that served as the fence’s impenetrable gate.
Their escapes became so numerous and humiliating that we were forced to make comprehensive security upgrades.
But these severe counter-measures failed to contain the puppy menace. Every chance they had, the puppies schemed and plotted, poking and prodding for weaknesses in Puppy Supermax:
Eventually all the puppies except for Barin were adopted by kind Russians, and Puppy Supermax was decommissioned.
Now Barin spends his days taking naps with his mom, Kartoshka (Potato).
Sometimes they go swimming.
However, I regret to report that EIVS is still unable to harness puppy-power. Now we have to push water and Barin:
That’s all for now.
Have a nice Thursday.
The Edward Institute for Village Studies is Novgorod’s most prestigious institute of higher village learning. An annual subscription of $35/year will help us expand our operations and tunnel network.
I love these updates from the Institute. They make my day.
That tunnel looks suspiciously like a root cellar for your potatoes. Dual purpose?
That soil looks like it's quite full of clay; is there a tradition of building earthen walls where you live? Being in contact with the earth is certainly a healthful activity per the various grounding/earthing vids I have seen. You can sell digging jobs as a healing vacation for the EMF sensitive....